Charlie the Tuna

It turns out the fate of Charlie the Tuna of Charleston, Ore., was sorry indeed. The 8-foot Monterey cypress sculpture was filleted by Mark Santos and Marvin Terry Jr.- who stole it as a prank and then, worried they would be found out, took chain saws to it.

"We had planned to wait a little while and then leave Charlie in a random place in town where he could be returned unharmed," they said in an apology letter published in The World of Coos Bay.

But someone tipped off sheriff's deputies, who started nosing around. Santos and Terry rushed to their hiding place and tried to move Charlie. But the statue wouldn't fit in their truck.

"We decided to chop him up so we could move him," they said. "This was not pre-planned." Deputies caught them in the act and charged them with theft and criminal mischief.

A wake is planned Saturday at the town's visitors center. The Wild Women of Charleston and the Tuna Guys will offer musical moments. The remains are to be burned and buried at the center. Mourners are invited to share stories about Charlie, and tuna recipes. (!?!?!)