Divorces Are A Headache

In a grim attempt at revenge against his estranged wife, a British businessman committed suicide by decapitation in his Aston Martin sports car, the U.K.'s Daily Mail reported Friday.

According to the Mail, Gerald Mellin, 54, had been consumed with dark thoughts surrounding his 34-year-old wife's decision to leave him.

The day before his death, a court had granted Mirielle Mellin additional alimony, the Mail reported.

Following the decision, in the last contact with his wife, Mellin sent a text message reading, "Congratulations, XXX."

The businessman then reportedly tied one end of a rope he kept in his Aston Martin convertible to a tree and wrapped the other end of it around his neck as he sat in the driver's seat. He then drove the car at a high speed onto a busy road, forcing other drivers to witness his violent suicide, the Mail said.

"Hangin'" On A Cliff

British teenagers partying on the ledge of a cliff were left to sober up overnight after rescue crews decided they were too drunk to be rescued.

The teens called the Coast Guard when a friend suffered an epileptic fit near Long Quarry Point, outside Torquay, Devon. Rescuers were not able to airlift all eight boys and girls to safety, due to rainfall and rough terrain.

In the end it was decided to winch the ill teen off the cliff, and leave the rest, whom the Coast Guard described as “under the influence,” where they were.

Monkey Massacre

Thirty-two research monkeys quarantined at a lab in Nevada were accidentally killed in May due to overheating.

Officials for the Delaware-based Charles River Laboratories confirmed the May 28 incident at its lab in Sparks for the first time in a statement issued Thursday.

The company said the death of the 32 longtail macaque in a single room of its quarantine facility there was the result of a series of human errors in the operation of the climate control. It said the incident affected no other primates and that at no point was the public ever in danger.

Hey Mang, You Know Where We Are?

Four Mexican soldiers crossed into Arizona and held a U.S. Border Patrol agent at gunpoint before realizing where they were and returning to Mexico, federal authorities said Wednesday.

The confrontation occurred early Sunday on the Tohono O'odham Indian Reservation; about 85 miles southwest of Tucson, in an area fenced only with barbed wire, said Dove Crawford, a spokeswoman for the Border Patrol.

The soldiers, outfitted in desert camouflage, pointed their rifles at the agent and shouted at him not to move, Crawford said. They lowered their weapons after about four minutes when the agent convinced them of who he was and where they were, she said. The soldiers then retreated into Mexico.

I Am Rich

Apple has spit out a pit in its iTunes App Store, a controversial $999.99 "glorified screensaver."

A glance Thursday of the store showed no offering for "I Am Rich," created by someone named Armin Heinrich. The app displays a glowing red gem on a user's iPhone screen for the sole purpose of proving to onlookers one is of the moneyed class. That's all it does.

But on Wednesday, when the app was present in the iTunes store, a little pop-up message told us "I Am Rich" is not available for sale to U.S. residents. Given the sorry state of the U.S. dollar, that might make sense.

Favre Is Garvage

The Brett Favre era in Green Bay is now officially over. And so is his career...

...he's a Jet.

As Smart As A Cheerleader

University of Texas security wasn’t amused by a cube of 26 teens that squeezed into, and stalled, a campus elevator Tuesday night.

The group of 14- to 17-year-olds was inspired to test an elevator’s maximum capacity while attending cheerleading camp at the university, The Dallas Morning News reported. When the elevator stalled en route from the fourth to the first floor, several girls panicked.

The girls “managed to wiggle a few cell phones free to call for help,” the paper reported. Police and fire crew responded, but it took an elevator repairman 25 minutes to extricate the squad.

One of the girls fainted and two others were treated at the scene, the Associated Press reported.

"It's dangerous, actually," a school police spokeswoman, Rhonda Weldon, told the AP. “There are signs everywhere: No more than 15 people or 3,000 pounds.”

Been There - Done That

Monroe County Sheriff's Office deputies were called to the Publix store Tuesday and arrested 54-year-old Brenda Bouschet after she was driving around with her three-year-old granddaughter on the roof of her car.

Bouschet said Thursday she would never let anything hurt her granddaughter. She says she was driving at "snail-speed" and holding the child's leg.

Bouschet told police she was giving the child some air and letting her have fun, authorities said. She faces charges of child abuse. The child is back with her mother.

Tito Jr.

Former porn star Jenna Jameson is pregnant with the baby of her boyfriend, Ultimate Fighting Champion Tito Ortiz, the New York Post's Page Six gossip column reports.

Backdraft?

An unexplained "thermal anomaly" caused a patch of land in Ventura County, just north of Los Angeles, to reach a temperature of over 800 degrees on Friday, baffling experts who have been monitoring the area for weeks.

The anomaly was discovered after the land got so hot that it started a brush fire and burned three acres last month. Firefighters were brought to the scene after reports of a blaze, but by the time they arrived only smoldering dirt and brush remained.

Firefighters took no chances with the smoking ground, clearing brush near the fumes and cutting a fire line around the area to prevent a blaze from igniting.

Officials who are familiar with the patch of land, which is near the large Sespe Oil Field, have come up with a few theories as to why the ground soared to 812 degrees fahrenheit on August 1.

One theory is that natural hydrocarbons, such as oil or gas, are burning deep in the earth and seeping out through cracks in the area, causing the surface to rapidly heat and generate smoke.