Wicker Man - Comedy of the Year

Proof that it doesn't get any better than Nicholas Cage....

Choose Wisely

As "Disturbia" rolls into it's third week as number one at the box office, we have a very critical decision to make:

LaBeouf?

-OR-

Lisa 'Boof' Marconi?

A Case Of The Mondays

I know Flightplan was a horrible, horrible movie….

But I’d rather be home on the couch watching that right now.

You feel me?

Disastrous Flightplan

I just got done watching Flightplan starring Jodie Foster and Peter Sarsgaard.

Wow.

That is one of the worst movies that I've ever seen.

Has Jodie Foster had a hit since Silence of the Lambs? It's like she's got the "My-ass touch" rather than the "Midas touch", becauses every movie that she's in turns to shit.

Peter Sarsgaard?

Wow.

Man in the Mirror

Make the change. Enjoy the weekend.

IRON HEAD

Zestfully Clean! "What's with this Thingy?"

Update! Update!

An Indian court ordered the arrest of Hollywood star Richard Gere, seen here with 50 cent at a FingerMyBlog Rally, on Thursday for kissing Bollywood actress Shilpa Shetty at an AIDS awareness event this month saying it was an obscene act committed in public.

The order by a court in the northern city of Jaipur came in response to a complaint by a local lawyer.

The judge watched a video recording of Gere kissing Shetty and found him guilty of violating Indian laws against public obscenity, the lawyer, Poonam Chand Bhandari, said. The court also summoned Shilpa Shetty to appear on May 5, Bhandari said, adding that Gere was also ordered to be arrested.

Gere can be sent to jail for up to three months or fined or both for the crime if he is arrested. He is not in India now but can be held if he visits the country again.

The Hollywood star is a devout Buddhist and a vocal supporter of the Tibetan cause and visits India frequently to meet the Dalai Lama, who lives in exile in northern India.

He is also involved with charities looking after HIV-infected people and orphans, as well as AIDS prevention groups in the country.

Groups of men had burned and kicked straw effigies of Gere and Shetty in sporadic protests across the country after newspapers published the picture of the kiss on their front pages and TV channels aired visuals of the event.

Two Thumbs Up!

Roger Ebert, the 64-year-old film critic, had surgery June 16 to remove a cancerous growth on his salivary gland. He also had emergency surgery July 1 after a blood vessel burst near the site of the operation. Ebert wrote that what happened was cancer of the salivary gland had spread to his right lower jaw. A segment of the mandible was removed, and two operations to replace that segment were both unsuccessful, "leading to unanticipated bleeding."

A tracheostomy, which opens an airway through an incision in the windpipe, was done, meaning Ebert cannot speak. "The doctors now plan an approach that does not involve the risk of unplanned bleeding. If all goes well, my speech will be restored," he wrote.

Ebert will watch the ninth annual Overlooked Film Festival, which begins Wednesday night at the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign, from the audience. "I will be wearing a gauze bandage around my neck, and my mouth will be seen to droop."

"I was told photos of me in this condition would attract the gossip papers," he wrote. "So what?"

Eberet wrote that friends were worried about unflattering photos of him being taken and unkind comments being written. He wrote that he doesn't care. "We spend too much time hiding illness."

The Tukkurjee!

(they took our jobs)

Late Hit!

He okay...nothing 30 stitches can't fix. I just can't believe he's alive. Sign him!--he can take a hit.

Wolfgang H.

An early-morning German bank customer had a bit of a shock when he found a horse already in line at the automatic teller machine in front of him. It seems the horse's owner, identified only as Wolfgang H., had a bit too much to drink the night before and decided to sleep it off inside the bank's heated foyer, police said Tuesday.

The 40-year-old machinist told Bild newspaper he had had "a few beers" with a friend in Wiesenburg, southwest of Berlin, and decided to hit the hay in the bank on his way home.

"It was late, it was already dark and cold," he was quoted as saying.

Confronted with the lack of a hitching-post, he brought the 6-year-old horse, named Sammy, in along with him.

When a customer came across the horse and sleeping rider in the bank at 4:15 a.m. Monday, he called police, who then came and woke the owner up and sent him on his way.

No charges were filed, but there might be some cleanup needed: Apparently Sammy made his own after-hours deposit on the carpet.

Serpico's Birthday! Whoo-ah!

Lt. Col. Frank Slade: Out of order, I show you out of order. You don't know what out of order is, Mr. Trask. I'd show you, but I'm too old, I'm too tired, I'm too fuckin' blind. If I were the man I was five years ago, I'd take a FLAMETHROWER to this place! Out of order? Who the hell do you think you're talkin' to? I've been around, you know? There was a time I could see. And I have seen. Boys like these, younger than these, their arms torn out, their legs ripped off. But there isn't nothin' like the sight of an amputated spirit. There is no prosthetic for that. You think you're merely sending this splendid foot soldier back home to Oregon with his tail between his legs, but I say you are... executin' his soul! And why? Because he's not a Bairdman. Bairdmen. You hurt this boy, you're gonna be Baird bums, the lot of ya. And Harry, Jimmy, Trent, wherever you are out there, FUCK YOU TOO!

Ridin' That Train...

The Coast Guard began unloading more than 40,000 pounds of cocaine seized from three ships off the Central American coast, much of it from a single bust considered the largest in U.S. maritime history.

Coast Guard officers had boarded a 330-foot ship heading north off the Pacific coast of Panama last month and discovered about 38,000 pounds of cocaine in two shipping containers, officials said. It was the largest single sea-based seizure of cocaine by a U.S. agency, said Coast Guard Petty Officer Brian Leshak.

Crews unloaded the cocaine Monday at a port in California, along with cocaine from two other busts. In one, also last month off Panama, a Coast Guard cutter chased down a speedboat carrying about 2,000 pounds of cocaine, officials said. The other bust was in February and involved an Ecuadorian-flagged fishing vessel that allegedly set fire to their ship and tried to flee in the speedboats but were caught, the Coast Guard said. About 900 pounds of cocaine were seized there.

The cocaine, with an estimated street value of $500 million, will be turned over the U.S. Drug Enforcement Administration, which will take the drugs to Miami to be destroyed, Leshak said.

Feelin' Lucky? The Clock Is Ticking

At midnight, some lucky winner could become, officially, very fuckin’ unlucky.

That's when a winning New Jersey Pick 6 Lotto ticket, sold one year ago in Newark, expires. And, with it, the $19 million prize.

If no one comes forward to claim the prize, the money will go to The Chris(t) Kelly Foundation.

But, the ticket holder still has time to redeem the winner, either by showing up at lottery headquarters in Trenton by the end of the business day, or having it validated at a lottery retailer before midnight.

The winning numbers were 4, 8, 15, 16, 23, & 42.

The Land That Time Forgot

Students of Turner County High School started what they hope will become a new tradition: Black and white students attended the prom together for the first time on Saturday.

"Whites always come to this one and blacks always go to this one," said Lacey Adkinson, a 14-year-old freshman at the school in rural Ashburn, Georgia. "It's always been a tradition since my daddy was in school to have the segregated ones, and this year we're finally getting to try something new," she said

"There was not anybody that I can remember that was black," she said. "The white people have theirs, and the black people have theirs. It's nothing racial at all." (???)

But this year's upperclassmen -- 213 students total --voted to have just one official prom. "It's been a dream of all of ours," Senior Class President James Hall said.

The theme of the first official prom: Breakaway.

But not everyone in the town of 4,400, famous for its peanuts and Fire Ant Festival, was breaking with the past; the "white prom" still went on last week.

"We did everything like a regular prom just because we had already booked it," said, Cheryl Nichols, 18, who attended the dance.

Some have asked, “Why can't you come?' and they're like, 'My mommy and daddy -- they don't agree with being with the colored people,' which I think is crazy.”

One other tradition ended this year -- having two separate homecoming queens.

"You pick the homecoming queen for their personalities and being a role model," explained Roshunda Pierce, 16, as she waited to get her nails done for prom.

Aneisha Gipson, who was crowned prom queen, said the night could not have been better, "Amazing. It was absolutely amazing. It was perfect."

R.I.P.

with a baseball bat!

Catch Ya Later, Alligator...

A child, surnamed Liu, disappeared Friday after Liu and three other children climbed over the fence around a pool in the park that had been used to stage crocodile shows.

"The children shot the animals with catapults and beat them with wooden sticks," the news agency said. "One of the irritated crocodiles bit Liu's clothes and dragged him into water, where he was eaten by a swarm of crocodiles."

The crocodile was shot Saturday in a park in Beihai, a city in the Guangxi region, by investigators looking for the missing child. Investigators confirmed that human remains found in the reptile were that of the student, the report said.

Snipers used pork, the other white meat, to lure the reptiles from the pool on Saturday and shot the first one that crawled ashore, the report said.

No other details were given, and it wasn't immediately clear what would happen to the other crocodiles. Elton John could not be reached for official comment, but hopes the crocs keep on "Rockin".

BackDraft? Naw. Cal Akbar.

A Philadelphia firefighter who called police "pigs" and threatened to turn them into "bacon bits" in a rap song has been placed on administrative leave pending an internal investigation, a Fire Department official said yesterday.

Rodney Jean-Jacques, 30, who performs as Cal Akbar, drew condemnation from police and fire officials after police officers revealed the lyrics on an Internet bulletin board April 10. He lists his label as Larsiny Records and has a bio at http://www.larsinyrecords.com/ that explains that he began rapping in the ninth grade as Kid Caliber. He later named himself Cal (for caliber) Akbar (Arabic for great).

Although Jean-Jacques did not respond yesterday to a message left at his mother's house, his MySpace page identifies him as Akbar - "Public Enemy #1”.

Under interests, he lists: "Rapping, reading, writing, weight lifting, shop lifting, gettin money, spendin money, the internet, photography, drinking cognac, handguns, assualt rifles, driving fast, sex, and any activity that I can get an adreneline rush from."

He is quoted as saying his influences are "life itself . . . things I read, things I see, life experiences . . . all of that inspires me."

The bio proclaims: "When you hear Cal Akbar's thunderous voice, you know a storm is coming, so you'd better take shelter!"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MERjef9hzOY

Chappelle Puts On 'P-Funk-like' Performance

Now that he's back on the standup circuit, Dave Chappelle has a lot to say.

The comic, who walked out on a $50 million deal to continue his TV show and briefly took a respite in South Africa, shattered the Laugh Factory's endurance record by taking to the comedy club's stage for six hours and seven minutes on Sunday.

"He was absolutely amazing, for six hours making people laugh," the club's owner, Jamie Masada, said Tuesday.

Masada said the previous record of three hours and 50 minutes was accomplished earlier this month by Dane Cook. But until then the mark had stood at two hours and 41 minutes since Richard Pryor set it in 1980.

He has since returned to the standup circuit and released the documentary "Dave Chappelle's Block Party."

Mary Celeste

Australian rescuers were on Friday trying to solve the "Mary Celeste" style mystery of a yacht found floating off the coast with its engine running, food on its table ready to eat, but no crew.

The 12-meter (36 feet) catamaran was found 80 nautical miles off Townsville on the northeast coast, but there was no sign of the three crewmen who had set sail from Queensland state bound for Australia's west coast on Sunday.

"What they found was a bit strange in that everything was normal, there was just no sign of the crew," Jon Hall from emergency management in Queensland told local radio on Friday. Hall said the yacht's sails were up but one was badly shredded. He said the engine was running, there was food on the table, a laptop was turned on, and the radio and global positioning satellite (GPS) were working.

Three life jackets and survival equipment, including an emergency beacon, were found on board, but no life rafts.

The Mary Celeste was an abandoned "ghost ship" found off the coast of Portugal in 1872. None of the Mary Celeste's crew or passengers were ever found.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marie_Celeste

Will Farrell in "The Landlord"

Genius.

Game. Set. Match.

Hair today...gone tomorrow.

What a long strange trip it's been.

The Future Of Beer Pong

Are YOU ready?

Happy Birthday Conan!

Born: April 18, 1963

(a long time supporter of FingerMyBlog)

Thank you.

The Smoking Gun (no pun intended)

Not only was he a "little crazy", he was also a "little Bill Shakespeare"...

This play by Cho Seung-Hui, a 23-year-old English major, was submitted last year as part of a short story writing class. Entitled "Richard McBeef," Cho's bizarre play features a 13-year-old boy who accuses his stepfather of pedophilia and murdering his father.

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/years/2007/0417071vtech1.html

Cho Seung-hui

--That Bastard.

After Yesterday, You May Need A Smile...

...this should do it.

Voodoo Chile?

An official announcement is expected on Tuesday that Vince Young will appear on "Jimmy Kimmel Live" as part of the kickoff promotion for the newest version the popular NFL video game that is endorsed by NFL Hall of Fame coach and analyst John Madden.

The Tennessee Titans quarterback will appear on the cover of Electronic Arts' Madden 2008 football games this year, reports Nashville's City Paper.

Popular superstition holds, as you probably know, that the Madden cover is "jinxed" and that every player who appears on it suffers a serious, usually season-ending, injury during the year the game is on shelves. Madden 2007's cover star Shaun Alexander injured his left foot and missed six games in 2006.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Madden_curse

Burn, Baby! Burn!

Richard Gere's repeated kisses on the cheeks of Bollywood actress Shilpa Shetty in an event to promote AIDS awareness sparked protests in India on Monday with demonstrators burning effigies of the actors.

Many saw the act as an outrage against Shetty's modesty and Indian culture, though Shetty herself angrily dismissed the protests as an "over-reaction" that made India look silly.

Groups of men burned and kicked effigies of the actors in protests across India, including in the northern Indian cities of New Delhi, Kanpur, Meerut and Varanasi as well as in the central city of Indore.

Some called for the actors' deaths. Others wanted public apologies. Fingermyblog demands both!!

The clinch between the two stars had originally gone down well when it happened onstage at an event on Sunday night to encourage truckers -- seen as a high-risk group in India's fight against AIDS -- to wear condoms during sex.

"No condom, no sex," an ebullient 58-year-old Gere shouted in Hindi to thousands of truck drivers who roared his words back in unison at a dusty fairground in New Delhi.

Woman In You

Sweet Sounds.

Starting All Over

Why does it feel like every Monday we have to start all over? I mean the weekends with friends and family fly by so fast, it's almost like we don't get a chance to enjoy it. Now we're back here (work) and trying to just get through the week to do it again. Oh well...we'll always have the memories.

I've Got My Eye On You

This is real. Isn't that unreal?

No Matter How Long, No Matter How Far

Though not the highest peak in the state, Karpuk Peak is the most traveled to house in North America and second in the world only to Mr. Fujimoto’s in Japan. Joe O. was the first white man to see the peak in 1806. Unfortunately, the man whose name is tied to the peak, was never able to reach the summit. He even predicted that no one would ever be able to scale this Hellertown mountain. But in 1820, Avon Marksdale and 13(?) others climbed the mountain and reached the summit. Today, over 16 people reach the summit each year, either by foot, automobile, or railroad. Those who have reached the summit understand what Kathy Lee Bates felt when she reached the summit, and was inspired to write the poem "America the Beautiful."

There are a few ways to reach the summit. For those who wish to hike it, the Perkiomen Trail leads up the mountain to the summit. For those not in the physical condition to hike up, Highway 76 also leads to the summit. For a travel back in time, you can take the Karpuk Peak Railroad to the summit.

Choose wisely…

The Not So Fresh Prince

First of all, is this Robert Horry or a really burned out Will Smith?

Secondly, check out his line (stats) from Thursday April 5th's game against the Suns:

http://sports.yahoo.com/nba/boxscore?gid=2007040524

Tim Allen (Dick)

ONE WILD HOG: On 2 October 1978, Tim Allen Dick was arrested in Detroit for possession of a pound and a half of cocaine. Under Michigan law, he could have been sentenced to life in prison. Instead he turned state's evidence -- the legal term for ratting on your cohorts. Allen reportedly fingered at least 21 co-conspirators, and in exchange, he was sentenced to just five years under the more lenient (at that time) federal law. He was paroled after 2½ years, and after dropping his last name, he has become one of America's most successful ex-cons gone legit.

He was arrested for drunk driving in 1997, after he nearly fell over and couldn't count backwards during a roadside sobriety check. The arrest effectively brings Allen's life story full-circle: A drunk driver killed his father when Allen was 11.

Also in 1997, Allen was in an auto accident in Studio City, California, and injured a 72-year-old retired librarian named Henry Armstrong. Armstrong told the National Enquirer that Allen "was bleary-eyed and unsteady on his feet, and he never uttered a word, never mind said sorry." Allen sued the old man for $12 million, complaining that Allen's "business as a well-known and well-respected actor, entertainer, author, commercial spokesperson and product endorser has been damaged." Allen dropped the lawsuit two years later, as a "humanitarian gesture" when he learned that Armstrong was suffering from brain cancer.

Kip Addotta, a friend and comic who mentored Allen through the early years of his career, says Allen "cut all ties with me" as soon as his TV show started.

Andy - Unemployed. Arrested.

Andy faces possible charges of felony second-degree assault and misdemeanor false imprisonment after his girlfriend told police that he poured an alcoholic drink in her face as she slept, put her in a choke hold and threw her onto a bed several times when she tried to leave.

When officers arrived, Andy said he threw his girlfriend down in self-defense because she came at him with a steak knife and cut his arm and face. The girlfriend denied slashing Andy. Police initially arrested the couple but "un-arrested" the girlfriend about an hour later, according to a police report.

Andy was arrested in 2004 on suspicion of drinking and driving after police say he suddenly stopped his gray SUV near the intersection of Broadway and College Avenue as a passenger stuck his head out the window and vomited. When police asked how much Andy, who was driving, had been drinking, he replied, "Plenty" — half a pint of Jim Beam, the officer's report said.

Brian Bonsall starred as Andy Keaton on "Family Ties" from 1986 to 1989 alongside Michael J. Fox and later appeared on "Star Trek: The Next Generation." He also had several movie roles in the 1990s, including "Blank Check" and "Mikey," according to TV.com. His latest police report stated he is unemployed.

Years

Years
They fly by in a blink of an eye
Flowers bloom and flowers die
Unknown are the reasons why
We say happy birthday to this guy.

Birth, yours. Yes.

Welcome Back...

...to hell.

Work sucks.

Mr. Wendal

Mr. Wendal has tried to warn us about our ways....BUT WE DON'T HEAR HIM TALK. Go 'head, Mr. Wendal!

2007 - Another Chapter Closes

In case you missed it, here is your One Shining Moment...is that Luther Vandross?

Chocolate Jesus

Democratic presidential candidate Barack Obama is causing a stir at a Chicago art school, and much like college, he’s wearing Jesus' robes and a neon blue halo again.

An undergraduate student's papier mache sculpture of Obama as a Jesus -- entitled "Blessing" -- went on display Saturday at a downtown gallery run by the School of the Art Institute of Chicago. David Cordero, 24, made the sculpture for his senior show after noticing all the attention Obama has received since he first hinted he may run for the presidency.

Obama's campaign worked Monday to distance the Illinois senator from the artwork, since he despises all artistic free thought.

"When you see it, when you spend time with it, you understand that it's not a provocative work at all," Jenkins said. "It is just plain ugly and you get tired of it…much like the man himself."

The piece comes amid Catholic outrage in New York that led to an art gallery canceling an exhibit featuring a nude 6-foot-tall, anatomically correct chocolate sculpture of Jesus Christ, called "My Sweet Lord".

Not to be confused with “Hershey Squirt Jesus” seen here…

Alexander Rae Baldwin III (born April 3, 1958)

The eldest of the Baldwin brothers, Alec Baldwin has starred in many movies and TV shows, but none so sweet as Beetlejuice.

Baldwin was born in Massapequa, Long Island, New York, to Catholic parents Alexander Rae Baldwin II and Carol Newcomb Martineau. His brothers are Daniel, Stephen, and William Baldwin, all of whom are actors; he also has two sisters, Jane and Elizabeth –who no one has seen or heard from in years (some say they were sacrificed).

Baldwin is frequently described as Irish American and his heavy drinking proves it. Good Things…

Happy Birthday.

George Washington

Start your week off right. Let me lay it on the line, he had two on the vine...